


The Declaration

by RoseMeister



Category: Shades of Grey - Jasper Fforde
Genre: Coming Out, F/F, but I still like them, i mean it's canon but super obscure, like they are mentioned in literally one line in the book, obscure pairing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-04
Updated: 2016-02-04
Packaged: 2018-05-18 04:20:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5897998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoseMeister/pseuds/RoseMeister
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jennifer's mother will be furious, and they've pretty much doomed themselves to a lifetime of whispers and nudges, but they have to do it. There's no way they'd stay sane if they didn't.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Declaration

Jennifer's hand is slick with nerves already, and even if it feels gross in Chloe's hand, reminds her of all the times she'd gotten cleaning duties and put her hand on something unmentionable, she would let it go for anything. Especially not now, with Jen about to do what is very likely the scariest thing she's ever done.

Chloe is well aware that Jen is a Red, and presumably a fairly high preceptor of that too, given who her family is, and the life that she'd described to Chloe is fairly comfortable. It's full of her mothers stares and sighs, her perpetual branding as the 'disappointment of the family' but regardless, it's still so much safer than the world Chloe lives in.

Jen's family, and her comfortable life certainly never convinced Jen not to take risks, clearly. Otherwise she'd be like most of the willingly blind Chromatics, doing their best to pay as little attention to Greys, at least when they aren't ordering them around. Instead, Jen is one of an insanely small number who have actually visited the Grey Zone, and pretty much the only one who went there willingly. And all for a painting. Most of the Chromatics hate to even glance at the Grey Zone, won't look Greys in the eyes while speaking to them, too busy pointing their noses in the air, but Jen always seemed more comfortable speaking to Greys than any of her Red peers. She always was determined to be different.

Even so, Jen always had the chance to be safe, easily accepted, but when Chloe looks at Jen now, long enough to see the steel in her jaw, when she feels the squeeze of her fingers, Chloe knows Jen wouldn't have this any other way.

Jen only really got to see the reality of life for Greys a few months ago. Chloe can still remember her look of slack jawed shock at all the things they have to deal with, the hidden wounds and unspoken, terrifyingly legal cruelty. And even with the things she's seen, Jen is still willing to have all that happen to her, ready to put everything she has on the line, safety, reputation, respect, family. All of it, for Chloe's sake.

She feels guilty sometimes, that she's the reason that Jen even needs to do this now, to be the cause of all this loss, but it isn't long until she remembers the girl Jen used to be, from faded glimpses from a distance, her memories of their first meetings, and Jen's echoed whispers in the dark. She can't help but remember the words that fell from Jen's mouth weeks ago, weighted with steel yet just as fleeting as all words are, sharp enough to carve themselves into Chloe's mind.

"You're the only thing who makes me happy anymore."

Chloe knows that's bullshit, really. Jen smiles at flowers, at the Vermeer. But she's also well aware that those smiles are only a recent occurrence. 

Chloe can see it in Jen's eyes, that this is something she needs to do, something she couldn't just lie about. Even if Chloe is a Grey. Even if it means Jen has to stand up in front of the entire village and declare herself.

The Head Prefect asks for anyone with personal news to come and announce it. Usually this means advertisements for particular hobbies and the like, but it is also the informally agreed upon time for declaration.

Chloe feels Jen tense up, but she still starts to move, pushing through the crowd. It takes her a moment to realise she's still attached to Chloe's hand, and she shakily unwraps her fingers from Chloe's. Chloe can see her hands nearly vibrating, her breathing loud, and she instead takes up Jen's hand again, squeezing it firmly.

Jen glances at her, confusion inked onto her features, and Chloe rubs her thumb along the back of her hand.

"I'll go with you." She offers. "We can do it together."

Jen nods, smiles nervously, but nevertheless looks relieved. Chloe still doesn't doubt that she is terrified. Chloe is proud still, because Jen still pushes through the crowd, and doesn't care about the stares, or the frowns of confusion. Chloe isn't even sure if she sees them, or if she's just blanking them out completely. Chloe can see them though, even though she doesn't look at them long. She can still feel the weight if them on her more than seeing them, and can almost imagine their thoughts. She can picture them taking in their hurried movements, their colour spots, and most importantly, their enclosed hands.

"Any other announcements?" The Head Prefect asks. Jen and Chloe are mere steps away from the stairs leading up to the stage, but Jen must have panicked, because she calls out louder than she probably intended.

"Wait!" Jen practically shouts. "I have one."

The Head Prefect starts, and stares at them, surprised by their sudden appearance, but he still stands aside, and offers Jen the microphone.

Jen wipes one of her slippery hands on her shirt before taking it, and hesitates. She glances at Chloe, and Chloe nods, trying to send as much encouragement as she can through the air to Jen.

"Um." Jen says, staring out into the crowd. "I'm Jennifer Cochineal. And this is Chloe G26." Her voice echoes over peoples heads, loud and clear, even if Jen is still shaking nervously.

Chloe squeezes her hand, and stands as tall, and as strong as she can. She stares out into the crowd, at the faces that she knows. She can see the mass of greys at the back end of the crowd, their faces nigh-indistinguishable from this distance, but a few of them raise their hands encouragingly, and Chloe smiles at the sight. Her eyes shift closer to the stage, and she picks out Jen's family, close enough that she can see Jen's mother frowning. Chloe doesn't linger on her, and instead lets her eyes wander further out among the crowd.

"And, um, we..." Jen's voice breaks off and as Chloe looks at her, she can see the panic in Jen's eyes, her struggle to get breath in her lungs.

Chloe gently takes the microphone off of her, and raises it to her mouth. "We are here today to declare ourselves in front of all of you. Thank you." She hands the microphone back to the Head Prefect, who nods stiffly at both of them.

"Continuing on..." He starts, but neither Chloe or Jen are listening to his words.

They move quickly to leave the stage, and Chloe pulls Jen's hand, leads her over to the edge of the crowd, where there is enough space for her to whisper into Jen's ear.

"I'm proud of you." She says, and Jen smiles, a clear burden off of her shoulders. "I know that was hard."

"Thanks." Jen manages, her hand rubbing down Chloe's arm. "I had to do it."

"I know." Chloe replies, smiling. "But it was still very brave."

Jen shakes her head, and leans in close to Chloe, her words dropped into the airiest of whispers. "When we get back to the Grey Zone I'm dragging you into the nearest room and kissing you so hard."

Chloe laughs lightly. "I'm looking forward to it."

**Author's Note:**

> These two are literally mentioned once in the book, in a single sentence, but you know what I Don't Care, I'm gay and I will write about lesbians if I want to.


End file.
